Maxwell Macleod was born on World Down Syndrome Day 2014.
Every year since then his mum, Molly, has written a piece for us to mark his birthday.
Here is her post for World Down Syndrome Day 2023…
In my world of work, I’m involved in the field of Restorative Practice. One of the guiding principles of the approach is the belief that ‘people will make positive changes when those in positions of authority do things WITH them rather than TO them or FOR them’ (Costello, Wachtel & Wachtel 2009).
This belief fundamentally underpins all my relationships, and how we parent Maxwell.
We try to involve Maxwell in decisions that affect him as much as we can, as we know this means we get the best of him.
Don’t get me wrong, quite often this is hard to do; especially when he can’t really understand us, he doesn’t want to do something, or when there’s a time pressure. It’s also hard when his desires to do something don’t match his ability.
Maxwell may have ambitions to be a stand-up comedian, an accomplished musician or an Olympian swimmer, and it’s heart-breaking to see him restricted by his inability to articulate himself clearly or his lack of core strength and co-ordination. However, Maxwell being Maxwell is rarely deterred by this, even his lack of innate talent doesn’t stop him having a go at something and trying his best, often 
with hilarious and surprising results. And his limitations certainly don’t stop us finding creative ways to encourage him to achieve the things that he wants to do, and that he enjoys.
This year we’ve been focusing on really exploring his talents and interests, for now this means cooking, being outside with animals (or just being an animal!) and of course dressing up and being a superhero. Yes, he still has to do his reading and writing practice which he’s not so keen on, but he is rewarded with fire building and face painting and cooking – we’re not quite at Michelin star level yet but sometimes it’s even edible…
He’s building his core strength through swimming practice and has recently joined the after-school football club which he loves. He’s also learning the guitar. He doesn’t know or care that it will help improve his dexterity for writing or help him to unbutton his shirt and tie his laces, for him he’s just having a great time being a rock star!
Most of all he loves being in the middle of the action, if there are superheroes, wolves or dinosaurs involved then all the more exciting, but whatever he’s doing and whoever he’s with, this is where he’s happiest, where he feels properly included.
This year Maxwell will be nine. It’s taken us a long time to find him the right environment in which to flourish and show us his true potential, but we’re getting there. He absolutely loves school and is starting to establish some lifelong friendships, as ever in his own way.
This year’s school report starts: ‘Maxwell is a kind, happy boy who always comes into school with a smile on his face, and his unique sense of humour has had us all in stitches countless times!’ His headteacher has also told us how happy she is that he’s part of their school community. Maxwell has finally found his gang, his groove and the place he belongs, and he is thriving as a result. So, he can’t yet ride a bike or score that goal or do even do his multiplication, but he is constantly giving it his best effort and making the most of every opportunity presented to him.
As always, he’s showing us how we should all be approaching life.
As long as we continue to work WITH Maxwell, nurturing his interests and promoting his independence, rather than telling him what TO do or even doing it FOR him, he has a chance to be the best version of himself
Already we’re beginning to see little glimpses of who he’s going to be when he’s older, and already we know he’s going to be fabulous!
