Written by his sister Linda
My brother John was born in Manchester in 1960 when I was just 18 months old. I don’t have any firsthand memories of that time, but know from my parents that he was several weeks premature and only weighed about 4lbs. The medical staff told our parents that they thought he might have Down’s syndrome but there weren’t the diagnostic tests available at that time for them to be certain.
John was two years old by the time a definitive diagnosis was made. His development was delayed and he was only just beginning to walk and speak. Our Mum took the view that John had decided he didn’t need to speak as I did enough talking for both of us. The doctors told our parents to expect very little of John both physically and intellectually; they said his life expectancy was much shorter than average.
As a young child I was brought up to understand that John was ‘special’ and as such he needed my help and protection, and that was certainly how I treated him in public but in reality, to me, he was just my little brother to be bossed around… I took him by the scruff of the neck as our Dad put it in his speech at my wedding.
When John was five he went to a small special school. I remember it being nice enough inside but there were bars on the big bay window at the front, something I associated with prisons, and I became very upset that there must be dangerous children at the school who might hurt John; I felt he would be much safer at my school.
In 1967 we moved to a new house in Bury about eight miles north of Manchester. The house was on a brand-new estate of cul-de-sacs with interlinking passageways, there were lots of children there and we played out constantly. I kept my eye on John and got into occasional fights when other children were unkind to him. There were times though when I felt the other children were too kind. For example, once when we were playing cricket and he was caught out the other children wanted to give him another chance but I insisted that he had to be out as he needed to learn. Quite often I got distracted from my responsibilities and John would go missing. When this happened the neighbours would organise a search party and after what seemed like an age of frantic activity, we would discover him in someone’s house, usually watching TV and eating biscuits, he was so cute he could wheedle his way into anyone’s affections.
John went to the local special school until he was 11, at which time our parents were concerned that he was not being sufficiently stimulated to achieve his full potential and began a campaign to get him into mainstream education. After much resistance from the local authority, a place was secured at a school which was designated for children labeled as ‘Educationally Sub Normal’ (ESN) – basically for children who struggled with education for a wide range of reasons. Whilst it was not exactly mainstream, my parents felt it was an acceptable middle ground which certainly offered John more opportunities.
At school John learnt to swim which he really excelled at and won many awards for. He was also good at football. Our Dad was a big fan of Manchester City but couldn’t afford to take us to the games so instead he took us to watch Radcliffe Borough, a non-league team. As a passionate supporter John once ran onto the pitch to demonstrate with the referee about something, much to everybody’s amusement. I followed Dad’s lead and became a City fan, but John chose Everton as his team. On leaving school, John went to an Adult Training Centre where his love of swimming and football continued. In 1989 he was part of a football team which competed in the GB Special Olympics in Leicester; this was the first time he had spent away from our parents and proved to be a fantastic experience for him.
After many years at the centre, our parents and the staff felt John could achieve more and he went to college to undertake an NVQ in catering, this led to some work in a local pub. Our parents continued to push and eventually, through the Access to Work scheme John was successful in gaining employment in a local factory where he has worked for the past 20 years.
Although our parents very much encouraged John to be independent in many aspects of his life, they were fiercely protective of him and would not entertain the idea of him leaving the family home and to be fair, to my knowledge, he never expressed any desire to move out. He clearly enjoyed being with our parents, he was fully involved in their active social life and they travelled extensively to Europe, Asia, USA and the Caribbean. Like them, he loved dancing and will still spend all night on the dance floor at a disco, especially if Shakin’ Stevens, Elvis or Michael Jackson are playing. He took lessons in ballroom and Latin American dancing as well so has a very good range of moves.
Sadly John’s life changed dramatically when our Dad died in 2002. John was devastated and was left with a big gap in his life. Over the following years our Mum’s health steadily deteriorated as she succumbed to dementia. Gradually John became her carer and 
became quite skilled at masking the extent of her illness. Eventually a crisis point was reached and she had to move to a care home. It was a very tough time for John but he was keen to stay in Bury so that he could keep his job and a place was earmarked for him in a new facility of self contained apartments which were being built at the time where he could live semi-independently. After a difficult year of living between the family home with support from a range of services and my home in Cheshire, he was finally able to move into his own apartment 11 years ago.
He has made many new friends and is now living life to the full again. He has a personal assistant Peter who shares his love of Everton FC and takes him to several games each season as well as supporting him with a range of other social activities. He has continued to enjoy weekends and annual holidays with my husband and I. Last year, just before the pandemic hit us, John celebrated his 60th birthday with 70 friends and family at a big party where he danced the night away. He’s already planning his 70th!